Look, when it comes to big fat butts, no body does it better than Kim Kardashian. Are you kidding me? The chick is talentless, but she gets a few million eyeballs on everything she touches because of her ass? What has this world come to? I have a big ass too, but when it comes to real estate and buying it right, rehabbing it then selling it, at least I have some talent! Thank God, my investing career has thankfully been longer then Kim’s videos or marriages.
You may have recalled my hugely successful blog post a few days ago about all the fools out there buying houses at crazy prices. As those cash rich sheeps set themselves up for the inevitable slaughter, the good Shepard - Mr. Craig G. Fuhr, just set himself up with a sweety-bo-peety of a deal. You gotta stick to your guns people.
See how I did it in the video below.
I have to laugh sometimes about this business. For the last eight years, its been a roller coaster of feast or famine. The deals are either so plentiful dropping like bikini tops at spring break, or their so few they seem like a skinny chick at a Jenny Craig meeting. Its a wave, people. And right now, we’re in the dessert waiting for a drop of water.
But guess what? There are people out there EVERY day buying deals. Did ya hear me? The deals are out there. Watch my two minute video below where to find out who’s getting all the deals!
Wanna be like the Donald? Buy yourself a couple mansions, a bunch of buildings, a trophy wife or two….oh wait, you don’t have the money for that? Well here’s how you get the money! Marketing, marketing, marketing! Its all about “the brand” people. From Coke, to Apple, to Trump, to yes, even Dr Dre (love those headphones) – you gotta have a brand. Did you know that creepy “Skeletor” of a thing, Bethenny Frankel sold her little brand for $50MIL. It wasn’t just a Cosmo mix, it was a Skinny Girl Cosmo Mix. Holy crap – if that ain’t marketing, I don’t know what is.
Here’s your 5 CRITICAL steps for marketing success:
Just like Whitney married Bobby (too soon?), you too will make mistakes along the way. Knowing the most common investor mistakes, however, is your best defense.
Unless you wore a helmet on the bus to school, the first rule is – know your market – should be obvious, right? Study your marketplace and what other investors, homeowners, buyers, and sellers are doing. Invest in your own backyard. Its probably what you know best, right? Not every vacant house is a winner. Don’t waste your time on “stupid,” houses. Too small, too main-drag, too ugly, too fringe does not work in this market.
Create an effective marketing campaign that brands you as a stand-out to drive leads and a marketing plan to secure long-term success. Remember, the typical response rate is 25 to 1, so don’t piss and moan when you get less than a handful of prospects.
I realize some of you may not have a lot of money to spend on marketing so here’s what: Spend what you can but spend it consistently. Pick a marketing niche’ and ride that ‘muv till the wheels fall off. If it’s working. Don’t change it. If you’re not getting the response you’d like – start testing new messages. Tweak. Don’t overhaul. And most of all, BE DIFFERENT!
Here’s a critical error most real estate committed by newbies: making business cards, establishing an LLC, and designing logos is NOT results. Its just action. There’s a big difference between action and results. Action doesn’t fatten your bank account, results do!
Finally, you may be all wide-eyed and keyed up for the potential deal like Justin when he saw Janet’s boob at Super Bowl, but keep the seller’s vision in mind, and look at the home from their perspective. Always remember however, that you set the home price, not the seller.
Make offers, people. No offers = no deals.
Mel Brooks once said, “As Long as the World is Spinning, We’re Gonna Be Dizzy & We’re Gonna Make Mistakes.” True dat Mel, but why not avoid these mistakes altogether.
Damn – I’ll sleep better tonight knowing that this is done! The motion to fine 5 major banks was filed today in Federal Court. Its safe to let your kids out again! You’ll recall that fine was a staggering $25 billion!
Can we all get on with our lives now knowing that all those buyers who were swindled into buying a house are now gonna get an average of about $350-1500.00 bucks BUT NOT the house. That’s gone. But, here’s an election year little gift for ya!
INFORMAL POLL
And, I’m gonna take an informal poll. Please email with the names of anyone you knew who got swindled by one of the banks mentioned below. I’ve bought hundreds of houses – so tell me, how do two people walk into a Realtors office, pick out a house, fall in love – then get swindled into signing 50 pages of fine ink, like some slight of hand by David Copperfield the banker! No one reads the fine ink….but your supposed to.
The Bitch-slapped banks include: Bank of America Corp., JPMorgan Chase & Co., CitiCorp, Well Fargo & bringing up (or taking it up the rear) is Ally Financial.
Here’s where it gets juicy: The banks will provide principal relief and borrower assistance totaling $17 billion. In addition, roughly $5 billion of the settlement will be paid in fines, while $3 billion will be used to help refinancing for homeowners who owe more than their homes are worth. The deal also includes new mortgage-servicing standards.
Instead of studying opera, I should have chosen law. Obama and and all his lawyers are splitting $5 billion large. I should have paid more attention Dr. Gordon’s music class.
Finally, does anyone think the Fed Gov is done? Really? Ever heard of big tobacco? Yeah, they got slapped and even though they’re looking like Courtney Love after a rough night, you can bet those lawyers out trollin’ will be coming back for sloppy seconds.
Bloomberg: “Foreclosure Settlement With Banks Filed in Federal Court”
WSJ: “Foreclosure Pact Alleges a Pattern of Malfeasance”
Courant: “Giant Mortgage Settlement Filed in Court”
New York Times: “What Homeowners Need Now”
This data is dryer than a popcorn fart, so I gotta add a little spice. This week, Jennifer Love Hewitt announced, that she has two favorite body parts. I saw it on Yahoo.com; “They’ve always served me well,” she said.” Hey, it was ON THE YAHOO HOME PAGE. Its not like I was searching for it. For my women readers who might be offended – think of this as your TMZ moment of this post.
That’s just shameless on my part isn’t it? Gees, I feel like Preston Ely all of the sudden.
And now back to our regularly scheduled real estate. Check the chart below. Uh, can you say opportunity? Does anyone really believe that the crisis is behind us, with the data below? Does anyone really believe that there is an end in sight to the short sales?
Here’s a bunch of factoids that could put you to sleep….just to show you that I’m not just a pretty face. There are brains behind my beauty. Is the market really getting better or is there just so little inventory that it feels like demand is swelling? Well, you be the judge after reading the following report from First American Improving Markets Index
The number of housing markets showing measurable improvement nearly doubled in January with the addition of 40 new metros to the National Association of Home Builders/First American Improving Markets Index (IMI), released January 9, 2012. The IMI now boasts 76 improving markets, up from 41 in December, with 31 states and the District of Columbia represented by at least one entry.
Is your neighborhood or area on the list below?\
Florence, AL
Tuscaloosa, AL
Fayetteville, AR
Denver, CO
Greeley, COB
Bridgeport, CT
New Haven, CT
Cape Coral, FL
Jacksonville, FL
Punta Gorda, FL
Manchester, NH
Cincinnati, OH
Oklahoma City, OK
Tulsa, OK
Corvallis, OR
Erie, PA
Philadelphia, PA
Chattanooga, TN
Clarksville, TN
Nashville, TN
College Station, TX
Dallas, TX
Victoria, TX
Madison, WI
Lafayette, IN
Lake Charles, LA
Worcester, MA
Grand Rapids, MI
Lansing, MI
Monroe, MI
Honolulu, HI
Ames, IA
Des Moines, IA
Dubuque, IA
Elkhart, IN
Indianapolis, IN
Minneapolis, MN
Columbia, MO
Joplin, MO
Fargo, ND
NAHB Chairman Bob Nielsen; a home builder from Reno, Nev. states, “The number of improving housing markets has risen for six consecutive months, and 36 states now have at least one metropolitan area on the list,”
NAHB Chief Economist David Crowe said, “This is a sign that a large cross section of the country is starting to turn the corner as local economic conditions stabilize.”
Kurt Pfotenhauer (say that 3 times fast) stated, “The fact that there are nearly 100 markets now on the improving list shows that the momentum is building for a housing recovery and that more buyers and sellers are starting to feel confident enough to return to the market.
Seven markets dropped from the NAHB/First American Improving Markets Index in February as they experienced softening house prices. These metros include San Jose, Calif.; Washington, D.C.; Kankakee, Ill.; New Orleans; Worcester, Mass.; Jackson, Miss.; and Sherman, Texas.
Unless you’re living under a rock, you’ve probably noticed that REO listings have dwindled to a trickle slower than an old guy’s pee. (its all about the prostate, baby!) But I digress!
Where are the foreclosures? Where are the REO deals. Well, I have taken the time to speak with many experienced investors, REO agents, and brokers and here’s my 4-minute take below. Watch out. Its coming.
I’d also advise you to look at this GREAT article on The KCM Blog
What do you think?
I loved this report on CNBC last week. Now, if you think I’m going to go with the conventional wisdom of the Oracle of Omaha, or the Real Estate Goddess, you’re dead wrong. If you read the MSN article below featuring Vena, you come away thinking that all humans are cut out to be landlords. If you listen closely to Warren Buffet, he says (paraphrasing), “I’d buy up a couple hundred thousand houses if it were practical to do so”
Its true, rates are low and houses seem cheap but, landlording is friggin’ tough! Especially in towns like Baltimore where landlords are hated. And managing rentals just might be one of the worst jobs in all the job-universe. Tenants & Toilets is not for everyone. Period!
So, tread lightly my friends. Internalize this right now: You can not make a living owning 20 rentals with leverage. If you have to pay the bank, the property manager and save dollars for the inevitable vacancy or leaky roof, there ain’t a whole lot left over for you. If however you could own all 20 of the same properties with no bank financing, now – you are truly makin’ bacon. Go ahead, let it sink in. It ain’t glamorous, but I’ll be damned if it’s not the truth.
Ask yourself this…faced with a 3-month vacancy, would you sleep better at night if you owed the bank this month’s mortgage on the rental, or if you owed yourself this month’s mortgage on the rental? This country is littered with the carcasses of dead investors who thought they would strike it rich as landlords making $300/mo cashflow.
So Vena Jones-Cox, I respectfully disagree.
Read MSNBC’s article with Vena: “Investors Buying Homes by the Dozen.”
Watch the interview with Warren Buffett “Warren Buffett Wants Houses”
Its been a while since my last post. I always feel like when I haven’t posted in a while, the blog becomes a confessional of sorts. Fact is, I LOVE WRITING THIS BLOG, but I just don’t make the time all the time to do it. My slacker-ness is about to change. You’ll see. This little blog of mine is about to blow up! So, rather than me getting into why I haven’t written in a while – let’s just move forward.
Now I’ve got a HUGE request for you.
I’ve achieved a lot. There are still more hills for me to climb, but I’ve successfully scaled many mountains and I sincerely want to help you do the same. I want to hear form you. Tell me (in a comment below):
1. What’s holding you back? Is it your head, a lack of deals, a lack of money, a lack of knowledge. Get honest and tell me the truth!
2. Tell me what your current niche is. Are you a short saler, wholesaler, rehabber, landlord, lease option’er…..WHAT do you do best?
3. Tell me what your average deal NET’s you. What is your average NET profit. Don’t be shy.
Just answer the questions above, and over the next few months I’ll write blog posts that speak directly to your replies. I wanna see my readers kick some serious ass in 2012. The new year is coming. I can help you. I know you can CRUSH IT – but you first have to comment below.
